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what makes us similar is, we play a role. If you think you are the best main actor, always remember OSCARS NIGHT isn't made for one category.

I'm 20 and confused?




Hi everyone, even though I'm not really a good writer but I just feel like writing at this moment. I don't even have a laptop of my own. it definitely reflects my careless in giving a simple commitment. As a university student, I am supposed to be a person who carries laptop everywhere, right? or not.

well if you guys are wondering whose laptop I am using now . well. the answer of course not mine.
hoping for more specific answer?

back to the topic that is more related to the title. I'm officially 20 and still remain the same. I can't see the difference of life that I'm living now with the life on the past years. I'm not being productive? Maybe.

The fun part is I started to realize recently that life is life. you will end up having no exact definition or explanation about life. All you can say is; life is life. Despite of the expectation you used to have about living life, I am sure when you have survived to this minute, you know you are now seeing life differently.. or you have experienced the unexpected.

Have you ever been in the situation where you were advised to be who you are and ended up being judged? well. being judged is not a serious issue if you know how to handle your own emotion. the part I really want to stress is are you at this moment you're reading this line seeing and admitting that you deserved to be judged on particular thing/minutiae; eg the way you dressed, the way you brought yourself forward etc. You are now have realized that particular thing is for true a big mistake you have made and now my question is, HOW sure you are now that you don't make a mistake? or you are now open to know that you aren't perfect , you know you probably make mistake now and you're ready to see life positively? and most importantly are you ready to learn that life never stops giving you lesson to learn?

And by the time you're knowing this, are you the same person you used to be? or you started to either become more confused or more clear about life?

I believe people have personality of their own. and I see personality as one thing just like other things that we can call one thing.

why and just why people think bright personality is the best and is it all that matters?. or maybe I personally see there is distinction between personality and attitude.

how many people with bright, warm personality are happy with themselves?
I'm not saying there's anything wrong with this kind of personality because I believe first impression is everything and people with this kind of personality are just like one stone with the ability to kill two birds.

what about people who developed personality influenced by so many things and unfortunately fortunate they are known as opposite to the warm personality. are they the birds that easily killed by a 'stone'?

and what is the function of externals?

I don't know if what I have wrote above is making any sense. but I don't know . I just feel like writing. again, I'm not a good writer, I might be a feeler, but definitely not a qualified expressor.

Personal message me if you want me to keep writing nonsense like this well because I have bundles.

Bye.

AM I AN EXTROVERTED INTROVERT?


Basically
this
cannot
be
more
accurate

Most people identify themselves as either an introvert or an extrovert, but what about the people who fall somewhere between the normal lines? I’m right there with you. I love going out and being surrounded by my friends, but I also crave the time I can spend completely alone with no distractions.
There are often times when I find myself surrounded by people wishing I wasn’t there; wishing I were almost anywhere but there. I’ll usually give myself a pep talk to try to get myself into the conversation so people don’t start asking, “what’s wrong?” There is nothing wrong; I would rather just be home by myself not trying to make small talk over things I have no interest in talking about.
Then there are times where all I want to do is go out and see every person I know. I’ll text nearly everyone I can think of to make sure they’re all going out. Interaction with others is a necessary and normal part of life, but sometimes I go out of my way to make the effort to make sure I will be surrounded by people I care about.
If this sounds like you, here are some more examples of what it’s like being an extroverted introvert (or social introvert if that’s the term you like better) is like.

 1. You have no problem talking to strangers but when the conversation is just small talk you’d rather just go back to being alone.

You can hold a conversation for the most part, but small talk doesn’t keep your brain engaged in the conversation. Small talk is light and fun, but we like more deep conversations. Not to say we won’t ever engage in small talk, because we do, that’s part of life, but we always try to push it a little bit further and dig deeper. We want to the conversation to lead to us actually getting to know the person.

 2. If you’re not comfortable in a group of people you keep to yourself in the back.

You love being surrounded by people, but generally only be people you’re comfortable around. Being around a different group of people makes you feel awkward and might even give you a little social anxiety.

 3. You have days where you want to talk to everyone and days where you don’t want to be contacted.

Some days you want to be texting all your friends and making plans whereas other days you ignore everyone. It just depends on the day; there is no real explanation other than you have two opposite ways to recharge and you need a balance of both. If you spend too much time around people you are dying to get back to the comfort of your own home. But if you spend too much time alone you desire being around others.

 4. You prefer meaningful conversation.

Like I said, small talk is not important to us. It makes us more uncomfortable, especially when the conversation goes nowhere, like usual. When we have a conversation we want to get to know you, the real you. We want to have something engaging and meaningful to talk about. Deep conversation is what it’s all about.

 5. You’re always wrapped up in your own head.

You’re always thinking, alone and with people. Your brain goes a million different directions, whether it’s thinking about something you have to do next week or something you forgot to ask a friend there is always something on your mind. You also frequently give yourself pep talks when you need some motivation.

 6. Sometimes it’s really hard to get us out.

Because what if it isn’t fun or isn’t worth it? I’d probably end up regretting getting up and leaving behind my books and laptop. But what if it’s the best time and everyone’s talking about how fun it is? There are nights when you don’t want to do anything and nights when you want to do everything.

 7. Just because you like being alone doesn’t mean you like being lonely.

There is a total difference between the two. You like being alone because you choose to be alone. But you don’t like being alone because you don’t have anyone there for you. Being alone and spending time doing your own thing is what makes you happy, but being with people also makes you happy. Being lonely satisfies nothing and completely kills both moods.

 8. You enjoy listening to others.
You enjoy listening to others because sometimes all you want is someone to listen to you. Even when you don’t have anything to say, you listening helps someone out because they know you’re involved. But listening to someone who has something going on engages us because we feel important, like we are doing something good for someone.

 9. You’re selectively social.
You enjoy being social, but you don’t want to be social with everyone. People that are involved in a lot of drama are completely out of your interest range. You don’t enjoy talking negatively about others and you’d rather avoid people who do. It makes you extremely uncomfortable.

 10. You make new friends easily, but have a harder time maintaining those friendships.
Making friends is no problem for you. When you’re out you love being out. You talk to people, you’re social and you’re happy. But after the night out is over and you wake up the next morning the importance of maintaining that friendship isn’t very high. Whether it be because you don’t feel like texting anyone or because you don’t want to leave the house it’s the maintenance that is the real struggle for you.


NOT MY OWN WRITING. ORIGINAL SOURCE: idealist4ever

It's 2014 and I started to write back!


Assalamualaikum and Aloha!

I'm not sure if any of my friends realized all this while I do have a blog. I started blogging since I was form 2.

SO WHEN I THINK, I MUST SPEAK,
WHEN I SPEAK, I MUST THINK.

Or in this context, you could change the word 'speak' to 'write'.
That's what I bare in mind. This entry might be the next victim of deletion.
It's really difficult when your mind, your emotion, your feeling are influenced and affected with what people might think and say about you. 

I started to have a blog since I was in the very young age, I'm not regret. I'm so thankful I have learnt something. At the end of the day, what makes us stand tall, is the choices we made. The experiences we gain everyday would help us in making decisions. That's what I state in me, don't be afraid of making mistakes, don't be afraid of the world because in front of you is all beautiful things await.



2014, I had completely done with school. I just left the world I used to be in. School life was so much fun. now it's time to face the real world, the badass one, the world where I have to be independent and not only leave the school but the worst part is leaving the home. A lot of things have to be sacrificed for the sake of chasing dreams, drawing a better future. it is a norm that has to be faced by most of the people all over the world. it is a first step to a practical life. it is major step to be what you want to be. it is an automatic step that everyone has to go through. it's like a tradition. it sounds like we have options but the choice has to be made before the options are yet given.

My SPM results? I must say there is one subject made me disappointed until today. overall, I'm feeling grateful.

what will I go through in the next few years? I wonder.
that's why I think I'm going to keep writing in this blog. just to share my ups and downs. if an artist only shares his journey when he already be what he wants to be. why shouldn't I start sharing today?

ambitious.

ambitious.

what if I end up as a failure?

ambitious.

no answer for failure.

because it's not failure, it's a wake up call.

you set your alarm in the morning, you don't want to wake up still.

you snooze your alarm for 5 mins. is this your failure?

then your alarm is ringing again.

what is your first failure in a day?
you snooze yourself too not only the alarm.


there's one thing I want to share, I didn't make it to my first choice to continue my study because of my SPM results. I have 8A's and those As actually mean nothing when there is one subject I got C.

the most pathetic part is when I took decision to RE-CHECK that C paper and my grade changed to B... it was too late. I didn't get what I wanted to. My education field now is way too far from what I'd planned.

However, I believe there is a reason behind all these things. I accepted the Diploma offer which takes 2 years and the half to finish. It's okay. I believe in His plan.

there's nothing to regret. I'm happy. more than happy.

do you think this is one of my failures in life?
I think it's not.

nah.

whatever. we never get what we want yet we will be given what we need.

PMR 2012 with full of suprises!


hello readers. dah beberapa hari dah results pmr keluar... tapi kejutan dan kisah di sebaliknya tetap segar di ingatan. Nak dengar kisah pada 19/12 ? jommmmmm *excitednakbercerita
19.12.12 - Taman Kota Masai, keputusan PMR yang dinantikan keluar harini. Gelisah campur geram campur nervous secukup rasa pada pagi ni. Pagi-pagi macam biasa dengan segaknya bergaya untuk ke sekolah mengambil results. *okperengganbaru
 
     Sampai je sekolah, awal lagi rupanya jarum jam telah menunjukkan kelewatannya bergerak. oleh itu, aku  pun bawak umi ronda-ronda sekolah sehingga terjumpa dengan papan kenyataan yang dihiasi dengan gambar-gambar calon pilihan pmr. Lepastu dengan eksitednya meneka, 'Ah umi, budak syaqira dan sarawana ni mesti dapat straight A's punyalah ! ' reaksi umi tetap macam biasa sempoi + relax.
 
      Pukul 11 hampir menjelmakan dirinya *ohMyBm, dengan langkah kanan terus aku masuk dalam dewan. ah terjumpa pulak dengan haziq dan saiful hakime. Aku tanya ada apa kat depan tu, haziq jawab 'ah tu lah cikgu umumkan yang dapat 8A *dialog dia lebih kurang macam tu lah :P . Aku dengan eksitednya bergurau dengan haziq kat belakang dewan ' okay, kalau macam tu bagi aku laluan siap-siap, nak pergi depan nih.' ketawa comel si haziq tadi.
 
     Then, first name 8A PMR dipanggil 'Daniel Adham bin ......' aku pun menyampuk kat haziq ' haziq, am ada kat kantin, aku nampak tadi'. aku macam nak pergi taknak pergi je panggil am kat kantin waktu tu.
Suddenly/ Literally/ tiba-tiba/ full of surprise, 'EDIEKA ISMA DANIEAL !' terdengar cikgu panggil nama aku kat depan.  Mak aii, aku tengah sebok pikir nak pergi panggil am ke tak nih kat kantin. Aku mamai gila kot masa tu. Haziq pun segah aku suruh pergi depan cepat.. Aku panggil umi ikut pergi depan dewan sekali.
 
     Aku pun berjalan ke depan dewan dalam lamunan seperti memenangi awards Oscar atau Grammys.
haha :P , reaksi umi yang relax tadi kini dia yang paling eksited plus happy ! pergi depan, ambik slip dengan cikgu Norhayati sambil diambil gambar oleh cikgu khairul anuar. pastu keluar je dewan, aku terdengar ucapan Tahniah dari ibu bapa murid-murid yang lain sambil umi mula mengeluarkan air mata *nak nangis...
 
     Tak sampai 1 minit, nama 'Muhd Haziq' disebut. yeahh haziq yang bergurau dengan aku kat belakang tadi   dapat 8A jugak. lupa nak mention, haziq tu classmate aku, meja duduk sebelah-sebelah je. Kira bangga ah kawan yang kita belajar sama-sama dapat results 8A sama dengan kita. Alhamdulilah . lepastu nama Ridhwan pulak dipanggil. wah, kira tekaan aku betul lah ! yang tak boleh tahan, Ridhwan pun classmate aku yang duduk sebelah meja aku. wahhh memang awesome.

     lepastu ada kejutan lagi, nama Sarawana dipanggil, wahhh classmate jugak, dia duduk sebelah Ridhwan dalam kelas. haha xD Awesomeee ! lepastu ada lagi kejutan, nama Siti Nursyaqira dipanggil, aku tahu korang dah dapat teka. syaqira tu duduk sebelah sarawana dalam kelas. haha xD lagi awesooomee ! kira bersyukur satu line meja semua dapat Straight A's.

skip story untill 3 paragraphs, xD

     selepas semua selesai, macam biasa kami jumpa cikgu untuk ucap terima kasih sambil ucap tahniah untuk kawan-kawan yang lain. Memang full of suprises lah ! ada kawan yang dapat 7a 1b , 6a, 5a, 4a, 3a. kira awesomee jugak results diorang semua...

Apa??? korang nak tengok gambar ke ? okay ... loadingggg .......

Alhamdulilah dengan keputusan yang diterima, mudah-mudahan dimurahkan rezeki untuk kita semua. semoga spm nanti diberikan keputusan yang cemerlang juga. Amin :)
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